Loans, College - Please help

Hi everyone.

I am currently 19 years old and I am attending an art university. My situation is that on school days, I have to commute to my school which is far from where I live, where in turn, is affecting both my education and personal/social life in numerous ways. I had originally believed (and still do to a certain extent) that if I am able to move into an apartment closer to my school, it would solve all my problems. However, I do not have a job, and I have never worked in my life so I wouldn't be able to pay it off. My parents will not help me in anyway, whether if its paying rent directly, getting a parent plus loan or cosigning a loan. The only thing they are willing to do is pay for my tuition. Aside from being really depressed over this ordeal, my grades are beginning to slip. I am really afraid of my future because the time I put into my schoolwork is being limited due to the distance I travel to school. I have told a few of my teachers about my situation (in more detail) and they also agree the time I put into my work is barely sufficient I have spoken to my counselors and financial aid representatives and it appears I cannot qualify for any private student loans by myself. I don't mind working to pay off rent, but where I live, there are no places to work. I believe if I had a private student loan that would cover about 6 months worth of rent, then I would be able to find a job near my school and pay off rent, pay check by pay check, assuming that my pay check is equal to rent.

Since this is currently hard to achieve, I have only thought up of 2 other alternatives.

The first being, to transfer to a different college. This may even be harder, considering that I would still need a place to live. The benefits I see through this is that the tuition would be cheaper for the colleges I am debating transfering to, then the one I am going to now. One problem is still the same however, is that my parents will not pay for the rent, rather the tuition alone. Assuming that I have to live in a dorm, the situation will still be the same, and my parents will continute to give unlegit reasons as to why they put me in such a situation.

My second alternative is to take all my classes online. This will not however, cure my social/personal life. To add to that, I am an animation major, meaning I need a powerful computer to do my animations. And I do not have a computer powerful enough to work with, nor will my parents help me buy a good one.


To sum it up, I am wondering:

1) Is there any alternative student private loan that I can get on my own? Maybe some super secret one that few people know about to get me jump started in living on my own?

2) Maybe would being an independant help? Reading around these forums, it seems hard, and neither does it seem to solve my problems in a organized fashion. However, I would greatly appreciate some input.

3) Suggestions? I am hoping that maybe someone with personal experience can help me through my situation.

What I am NOT asking for, however is:
1) help finding a job in my area
2) help on my school work

My life is really depressing, and I am fearing my future. I feel as if I am at a stalemate, and I really hope for someone to help me in this situation. Thank You.

if I am able to move into an apartment closer to my school, it would solve all my problems.

I know what you mean. I always felt like I had the weight of the entire world on my shoulders while I was in college. Thankfully, the stress and frustrations simply disappeared when I moved out of my parents house, got a job and paid my first months rent on my apartment. I was further relieved from my worries by college, roommates, groceries, utilities, phone, cable, insurance, auto, health benefits, dental, student loans, interviews, Parris Island, war deployments, marriage, mortgages, plumbing, heating, paperwork, bosses, performance evaluations, professional certfications, creditors, children, aging parents, etc. Now, I no longer have any problems. Ahhhhhh....blissful nirvana.


I have never worked in my life so I wouldn't be able to pay it off. My parents will not help me in anyway, whether if its paying rent directly, getting a parent plus loan or cosigning a loan. The only thing they are willing to do is pay for my tuition.

Bummer, and even after proving that you are resourceful enough to defer getting a job until age 19 they still won't do it for you?! Perhaps they are simply blinded by your explosive ambition. I suppose genius is seldom understood. Only 100% tuition and a debt-free entry into the workforce? Those fascists!


I don't mind working to pay off rent, but where I live, there are no places to work.

Perhaps living where there are places to work will help.


Assuming that I have to live in a dorm, the situation will still be the same, and my parents will continute to give unlegit reasons as to why they put me in such a situation.

What situation is that? Living in a dorm, or having just 100% of your higher education paid for? They both sound equally horrifying! I used to hear the same unlegit stuff from my parents; mortgages, consumer debt, retirement, can't afford it, done enough, prove yourself, builds character, time to stake your own claim, make us proud, blah, blah, blah...I hear ya' man.


This will not however, cure my social/personal life. To add to that, I am an animation major, meaning I need a powerful computer to do my animations. And I do not have a computer powerful enough to work with, nor will my parents help me buy a good one.

I'm married and also a hardcore gamer, so I know what you mean! I feel ya' bro'.


Is there any alternative student private loan that I can get on my own? Maybe some super secret one that few people know about to get me jump started in living on my own?

I think there's one called the "Pay-for-it-all-a-loan". However, it's definitely not super secret and it probably isn't what you're looking for. High interest required and only grown-ups can apply.


What I am NOT asking for, however is:
1) help finding a job in my area
2) help on my school work

Well then, I guess that leaves a FREE APARTMENT and no real necessity to work for 6 months.

Solutions 1 & 2 (above) sound like some maligned guidance you received from the teacher, counselor & financial aid rep conspiracy. I'm shocked to hear that they did not fully understand your situation.


2) Maybe would being an independant help?

Yes baoboa, it would. I would definitely give it a try.


Reading around these forums, it seems hard, and neither does it seem to solve my problems in a organized fashion.

Yes, it will require some additional effort. But hopefully, my input will shed some light in an organized manner.


My life is really depressing, and I am fearing my future. I feel as if I am at a stalemate, and I really hope for someone to help me in this situation.

I agree. I know what you mean and I think you're right. I hope you make it through these trying times. I think the "situation" you are referring to is known to many World-wide as "crossing into adulthood". Welcome aboard and Godspeed to you!


Thank You..

No problem. You are quite welcome.

Gosh, why did that feel so good? I just love helping people.

and what do you suggest i do then pricespector?
19, and never worked in my life. as i said thats because theres no place for me to work. if i moved into a place that had somewhere to work, ideally closer to my school, then that wouldn't be a problem.
I go to school. I get my work done. I can definetly graduate from my college. But it's what i learn that matters, and i think i'm only working towad the degree. what i put in is what i get out, and because of the limited time i have from commuting, not much time is going in.
And speaking as when I am graduated. What am I supposed to do from there? I'll still be stuck right where I am since I can't get any job. Even with the degree, I don't think I'll have the skills to work in my desired field. Even though my school has 80% students going directly into the industry after graduation, I don't want to be one of the 20%. And if you can't take me seriously, I'm just looking out for my future, and I don't want to be working towards nothing. I think you know the situation I'm in, but you don't understand it. I want to do something about it now so no unecessary time is wasted.

I'm glad that you are looking forward to the future, and trying to weigh your options now. That is, indeed, very wise of you.

But as Pricespector pointed out in a snarky way (and Price, I say that with full admiration for the power of a good snark! well done!), your post comes across as the whinings of a five year old who was denied a cookie, and that never looks good.

Here is one big fat reality that you need to face -- your parents are being AMAZINGLY, HUGELY, MONSTROUSLY GENEROUS by paying for your tuition. You are a legal adult, and there is NO OBLIGATION WHATSOEVER that they should pay for your education, or make it easier for you to deal with the stresses of education. YOU ARE LUCKY. VERY, VERY LUCKY. Now, quit whining about how "unlegit" (not a word, BTW) your parents are being by not paving your way with gold, and be thankful, grateful, and grovelingly loving to the parents who are giving you this amazingly expensive gift and opportunity.

Now, back to the problem at hand. Things are only as impossible as you make them. You have certainly "talked" yourself into a dark and narrow little box, where you're just bound and gagged by your "unlegit" parents. So, it's time to start talking about what CAN be done.

1 -- If you want to live in an apartment near your college, you will have to get a job in that city, near your college. It's that simple. The time between your first day of work, and the paychecks you need to save to move will be very stressful (perhaps you'll want to do this over summer, when you don't normally take classes, or when you take a reduced load?), but you'll be able to walk into your first apartment with cash money to make all the deposits and such. By then, too, you'll be well established in that job, and hopefully performing well, and they will want to keep you. So, like many of us who had to do it, you'll work and attend college, and it will be stressful, but at least you won't have a fat tuition bill on top of it, since your amazing and wonderful parents will still be paying for that.

2 -- Another option is to take government-backed student loans IN YOUR NAME ONLY. That way, your parents don't have to co-sign, and you will owe that money when you graduate. A lot of us have done this, too. You mentioned that 80% of graduates get work in the field -- you should realize that that is an amazing number! Yes, there's a chance you could end up in the losing 20% (are you good at what you do? Do you think it's truly possible that you won't make it? -- if yes, that's another issue...see below). But if the work pays well, you will be able to pay those loans back, hopefully. BTW, go down to "Careers" then to the thread "Cost vs. careers", where several of us are already debating the issue of career-income versus the cost of a college education -- see if you gain any insight into your own situation.

3 -- You can manage your schedule at college so that you are traveling only a few days a week. For example, I teach at a university that is 100 miles away from my home (for various reasons, I cannot move to the University town at this time). My wonderful and amazingly generous department head schedules my classes on Tuesdays/Thursdays, so that I only have to drive down twice a week, instead of five days a week. It's a hard two days -- from the time I wake up until the time I get home, it's a 14-16 hour day. But then I get to stay home on Monday/Wednesday/Friday. I get a four day weekend, which is plenty of time to do things like grade papers, or plan my next class. In your case, if you can shove all your classes to two days, you could use the other three to either work on your assignments, or get a job locally.

4 -- I know, I know...there are no jobs locally. I find that hard to believe. Are your parents living in the middle of the Kalahari Desert? Or do you mean, "there are no jobs other than chicken eviscerator at the local Tyson plant, or picking watermelons in the terribly hot sun"? Are you telling me there are no larger towns between where you live in the middle of nowhere with your parents, and the city where your school is, towns you can drive to and take up your shift at Popeye's Fried Chicken? Again, you've written yourself into a no-win scenario -- it's time to open your eyes, swallow your pride, be realistic, and start doing what it takes to succeed, instead of just whining about how unlegit your parents are.

Even with the degree, I don't think I'll have the skills to work in my desired field. Even though my school has 80% students going directly into the industry after graduation, I don't want to be one of the 20%.

This is a huge problem, and one you need to think about very strongly (see that aforementioned thread on whether or not degrees in certain fields are worth it). If you truly feel you won't have the skills to work in your chosen field, despite such a phenomenal placement rate, YOU ARE WASTING YOUR TIME, AND YOUR PARENTS' MONEY!!! If this is REALLY true, and you're not just once again creating drama, then you should drop this program of study, and go into something more realistic. I can't stress enough how amazing and special it is, that your parents are willing to pay for your education -- you should NOT waste this wonderful chance by pursuing a field of study you think has no hope in hell of turning into a career/paycheck for you. Go to the local tech school and be a welder or something. Go to a local community college, and get on the path toward a business degree or something. ANYTHING other than wasting your time in a very narrow field, especially if you TRULY feel you have no hope of success.

And again, if you're just whining for dramatic effect, quit that crud! Time to grow up and be realistic. If you apply yourself better, and quit complaining, will you succeed in that field? Then do it!

And speaking as when I am graduated. What am I supposed to do from there? I'll still be stuck right where I am since I can't get any job.

Again, you're as stuck as you want to be. I imagine there are indeed no animation jobs in Dogbreath City, where you live. Surely you knew that no matter WHAT career you chose, you'd have to leave that town, and go to one where there are jobs?

is affecting both my education and personal/social life in numerous ways.

One last thing. When you're this stressed out, have this much stuff going on in your life, and have parents generous enough to pay for you education, you need to jettison one of your "responsibilities", and in this case, it's the personal/social life. That does not matter, when you're trying to finish up college and get on with a career. There's time for a social life later -- there's very clearly no time for it now. Quit trying to work the ONE thing that gives you nothing of value, into a life already overflowing with things to do. Concentrate on your studies, be profusely grateful for your free education, and get finished with that degree, get a job, and get on with your life.

As you can see, there's no solution that makes the clouds break and the sun shine over your vasty fields of gold. There's only hard choices, hard work, and sacrifice. Ready to put on your big-boy undies, and get to work?

Thank you for clarifying my guidance Puck. It seems you like to help people too. It's kind of funny because the whole time I was responding, I kept thinking about your other post on parent paid vs. non-paid.

I don't feel for OP. Most of his costs are being absorbed by parents. Being debt free when you graduate puts you a HUGE leg up financially.

Get a job while in school, get creative. Getting more money, or a loan, or finding an easy way out is not what you need to be doing. Working will teach you things no class could ever teach you.

My suggestion is maybe schedule classes every other day. Then on the off days get a job, work 8 hours, then do homework for another 4-6 hours. Stash the cash away for the computer... then move onto the next problem.

Take a class over the summer if the "every other day" thing doesn't seem to fit. To me, one of the most important skills to learn is time management. People can find ways to create money, create things and destroy the same. But it is impossible to create time- we can manage the 24 hours we get each day, but cannot make day 26 hours, or shorten it to 22. Unless you cross time zones, but that will still catch up to you.

So maybe schedule all classes "consecutively" so classes are at 8:00, 9:30, 11:00, 1:30 etc... to allow more consecutive time in evenings and also make commuting more efficient.

You may not be able to get a loan if you do not work... but once you get a job and have income, some lines of credit may open up.

Why not get a job at the school? You do not need experience (which you state you do not have). My brother was an RA over a section of his dorm, which gave him a free dorm and he also did some part-time work in the school's book store.

Make it happen and don't just post here for a pity party (I am suprised you even got one with this crowd). The whole "my parents will ONLY pay my tuition and I am so depressed" routine makes me want to break out the world's smallest violin and start playing the world's smallest song...

Hey Puck,
thank you for the reply.

I didn't realize until I read your 3rd comment (3-) that there's no full comprehension in my situation, which is due to my lack of explanation, and I apologize for that. The problem is that I live so far from my school that I only go twice a week. I am a 3D animation major and the only time I ever get to work on my animations is when I am at school using their facilities. My computer isn't powerful enough at home to do any 3D stuff so that means the time I put in on those 2 days are not nearly enough to complete assignments, homework and to self teach myself. This also explains why I am afraid of when graduation comes I won't have the skills necessary to go into the industry. I do my work, but when the time comes, there will be many other people competing for the same job I am, and it will clearly show whos put more time into their projects.

I already understand that my parents are paying my tuition, and I am appreciative for that. But given the circumstances I am in, it almost makes me feel I am at the same level as other students struggling to pay for their tuition. My struggle is trying to find a way to get to school more often, and I belive the best way is to live near campus. What you put in, is what you get out. And unfortunately, the time I put into my work as of now is not much. Being closer to my school will give me the liberty to go on campus whenever I want, and ask for face-to-face help on my projects whenever needed.
(I hope this clears things up, and gives better understanding to my situation. It's because of this, it makes me feel I am in a league of my own.)

Maybe perhaps just getting a better computer will be more economical. If I had it my way, I'd go for both the computer and apartment. But as I said, if I lived near campus, it would give me the liberty to get professional help whenever needed. To add more toppings on the pizza, living near campus would also save me from the agony of having to go to school for that dreadful 12+ hours a day and a crumby commute ride. In the end, whatever that will help me to succeed, I will take.

In regards to your second comment (2-), What are the government-backed loans? I already know I have a direct subsidized loan in my name, that goes directly into my tuition which in the end my parents will pay for (some money saving strategy or something). Is it the same? From what I was told by my counselors and financial representatives, it is for tuition only. I know that Private Student Loans can be used for school related stuff, including housing. That is what I was hoping to go for to help me get jump started. If I was lucky, I would only need at most, 6 months worth of rent money from the loan to have things working my way (in realistic terms too).

I'm always looking out for my future, so if my 3D animation career dream fails, I already know 2 other fields of study that would be suitable for me. But the only ways I think I would fail is that I am not getting enough out of my education, which is already happening. My parents don't seem to understand that I am falling behind in my school work, and that I need more time to work on my school related stuff.